Sunday 17 January 2010

For science! And vaginas!

This lady deserves a medal.

You can now buy My new Pink Button for $30 (not even attempting a conversion, sorry, I'm lazy). It's, well, erm... it's VAGINA DYE. Not hair dye for your pubes (which is genuinely hilarious) but skin dye for your actual vagina. So the lovely woman in the link above decided to try it out, purely in the interests of science (and vaginas).

It's not dye at all. It's Kool-Aid powder, or something very similar.

Basiccally, self-conscious women are being scammed into painting their lady-parts with squash in order to have a 'natural' pink colour down there. Not only do I find this incredibly bizarre, as vaginas aren't meant to be neon pink, but as a biologist it bugs me something awful. Vaginas are not meant to have sticky, sugary things in/on them (however much fun that may be in certain circumstances). It wrecks the pH and the balance of natural bacteria so you end up getting yeast infections- yeast loves sugar, by the way- and horrible things like bacterial vaginosis, which makes your fanny smell of fish and leak greyish-greenish stuff.

Crap like this is kind of funny at first glance, but when you realise that it's all a con to make women feel shitty about themselves it's actually something to get angry about. How many of the women reading this have actually thought about the colour of their vaginas? I'm guessing none of you have had a sleepless night over it, because generally, if someone is close enough to your vagina to know what colour it is, they're more interested in touching it than matching it to a paint chart.

Oh, and they also suggest that dudes can use it for that special 'glowing penis' look. Seriously beauty industry, what the fuck?

This is an American product by the way, although it appears you can buy it online so pretty much anyone with internets can get some. Nom nom nom.

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